Early Disclaimer: This blog was sculpted using my personal experiences as tool. I am no expert. Just someone trying to share some tips and advice to anyone who needs or might need it.

Have you ever felt like you know something is wrong but you just can’t seem to pinpoint what is? 

How about feeling okay but deep down you know something doesn’t feel quite right, ever experienced that? 

I did. 

Lots and lots of times. 

And most of the times I still do.

It took me hundreds of sleepless nights, thousands of self-doubting moments, and probably countless “I’m okay’s even though I’m not” before I could finally pick myself up and understand wholeheartedly, although not fully, what’s happening.  

It was later this year when I realized that my body has been trying to connect and converse with me everyday and I was too preoccupied and naïve in a sense to ever notice that. I think most of us are.

Remember that one time when your stomach is clearly asking for food but you didn’t get up because you are “too sleepy”? 

How about that one time when your brain already felt like exploding but you still continued watching that movie/series anyway?

Those are just SOME of the many situation wherein you refused to listen to your body. We always complain and ask “what the hell is wrong with me?” “why the hell am I feeling this way?” and our body ALWAYS answers us. However, WE NEVER LISTEN.

I think it’s time we make effort in understanding ourselves better in order to answer most of our life queries.

LEVEL 1 - YOUR BODY WHISPERING FOR CHANGE

Are you…

• Stuck in Routine? Wake up - Eat - Work/Study - Sleep - Repeat? 
• Tired of working/studying but you still do it anyway? And you tell yourself everyday that you don’t have a choice?
• Sleep deprived? Or sometimes, although you have enough sleep, you still feel so tired most of the days? 
• Having some noticeable appetite changes? Eating a little too much? Eating a little to less? 
• Constantly wanting to talk to someone / wanting to go out? Like you just want to runaway to somewhere with someone?

If YES, Then you might be STRESSED OUT.

HERE ARE THE THINGS THAT YOU MAY WANT TO DO:

If you are stressed out, the first thing that I want you to do is to remind yourself that YOU ARE NOT RUNNING OUT OF TIME. You have to slow down. It’s never a sin to BREATHE. By doing so, you’d be able to turn your routinary activities into something you are passionate about. Something that you love. 

While it is true that you need someone (to talk to or to be with) during these times, it is also vital for you to have a ‘ME TIME’ at this point. You are stressed out because you don’t have a time for yourself anymore. DO IT. Acquire new hobbies (e.g. cooking/planting/writing/etc.) Even though you have work or you have to study, find time to do something that excites you. You may also do something that scares you. Spice up your daily routine! Because if you won’t, you’ll never learn how to love the life you are in. 

LEVEL 2 - YOUR BODY SHOUTING FOR HELP.

Are you…

• Stuck in Routine? Again, Wake up - Eat - Work/Study - Sleep - Repeat? And everyday it gets harder and harder and most of the times heavier?
• Feeling less motivated to do work/study day by day? Most days you just want to say “screw it” and leave.
• Having noticeable changes in your sleeping pattern? It’s either you have little to no sleep at all or you have prolonged sleep.
• Having noticeable appetite changes as well? - Just like the latter, it’s either you have little to no appetite at all or you are eating way too much.
• Losing interest in talking to most people? Most days you want to reach out to someone/anyone but also hesitating because you’re afraid you can’t explain how you really feel.

If everything above fits your current situation, I believe you might be feeling BURNT OUT.

HERE ARE THE THINGS THAT YOU MAY WANT TO DO:

If you found yourself in the ’burnt out’ stage, then most likely it is because you lost one of the most important thing — your goal. Everything feels heavy and hard because you forgot where you are headed to. Imagine being instructed to carry loads of boxes all day without you knowing when and where to put it down. Tiring right?

So, at this point, you may want to remind yourself of your goals (why you started and all that) OR set new goals. You need to constantly challenge yourself so that you can move forward. Also, ‘keeping it to myself’ won’t work here. This is the perfect time to RECONNECT. Open up to your friends or to your family, if you want even to stranger. Listen to what they have to say. You’d be surprised at how amazing it feels to have someone understand how you feel. Or have someone who listens to you even though they cannot understand. Who knows? Maybe by doing this you are also helping them unload their own set of burden and struggles.

LEVEL 3 - YOUR BODY BEGGING FOR ATTENTION

Do you have…

• A really messed up routine? Eat - Eat - Sleep - Sleep - Sleep - Do I need to work? - Should I wake up? - Sleep - Sleep? You’re not even thinking about the things you’ll do tomorrow. It’s like everyday is completely the same but in a sense also very different.
• No motivation to do work /  study?  Not even a little ounce. Fuck everything?
• No sense of time anymore? You don’t even know if it is morning or night. Let alone the date. You don’t even know what day, what month, or even what year is it.
• A muddled sleeping pattern? It’s either you have no sleep at all or you have too much sleep. There’s no in between.
• No appetite at all? None for food. None for anything.
• This feeling of not wanting to talk to anyone? Because you feel like since you don’t even understand your own self, how would they? You just don’t feel like explaining everything to anyone at all. 

Given these signs, you might be feeling DEPRESSED.

HERE ARE THE THINGS THAT YOU MAY WANT TO DO:

If you are in a state of general unhappiness, if you are depressed, if you are feeling lost,  feeling weak, the first thing that I want you to do is to let it. Feel it all in. Feel the pain. Feel the sadness.

Look. If someone you don’t know heads towards you and slaps you hard in the face, what would you do? Right. First you’d feel shocked then you’d react. Why? Because you felt it. It hurts. You’d feel the urge to do something. Slap him/her back maybe. Cry. Shout right at their face. And all those possible reactions you could think of. That’s how it should be.

Most often than not, people who are depressed mistake ‘feeling everything all at once’ for ’not feeling anything’. Once they get overwhelmed, they unconsciously shut themselves off. They refuse to feel. If you feel really down, the first step to being okay is to recognize how not okay you are. You have to confirm that the situation you are in is awful.

After that, ask yourself. “Do I want to feel like this for the rest of my life?“  If yes, then with all pleasure, please do so. If no, then react. Cry as much as you want and as much as you need THEN pick yourself up. Start by eating enough. Then reconnect. Not necessarily with others, reconnect with yourself. Slowly, do the things that make you feel comfortable and happy. Do the things that make you feel alive. Talk to someone so that you can see your situation in a different perspective. 

It’s never gonna be easy. You’ll just have to be stronger.

AGAIN, I AM NOT AN EXPERT. I am just someone who had experienced all that and is lucky enough to have received help from my support system, thus making me want to reciprocate and shower others with the help that I was given before. 

To sum it all up, let us just always listen to what our body is telling us physically, emotionally and mentally. Watch out for the signals! And most importantly, let’s be gentle with ourselves. We don’t like it when others treat us badly so please let us not do it unto ourselves. 

THANK YOU SO MUCH (REALLY) FOR READING THIS FAR! I really appreciate it. I hope this helped you somehow.

It would be my greatest pleasure if you’d share this to someone who might need to hear it. It would also mean the world to me if you would share your comments and insights on the discussion box below. You may also connect with me through Instagram (@kathcaguite). I would love to hear something from you!

AUTHOR: KATHRESE CAGUITE

DATE WRITTEN:  SEPTEMBER 2020